This is easily my favorite pair of episodes so far, for a lot of reasons. "Chrissy's Date," which aired a couple weeks before "Alone Together" (with no other episode in that gap), has always been one of my favorites of the second season of 3'sC, and "In Praise of Older Men," which appeared on 23 January 1974, is the best of the second series of MatH. 3'sC11 placed #4 in the ratings, one of the three best showings at that point.
Zyxik: Robin/Jack and Jo/Janet are playing Scrabble. He objects to the word she puts down. She says she hasn't finished yet. "L-E. Title." On 3'sC we actually get a close-up of the board long enough to read T-I-T upside-down, which I figure they got past the censors because this was years before VCRs (not to mention DVD players) were common and it was less likely that anyone would catch that.
His word is Z-Y-X-I-K. He defines it as an Abyssian noseflute used to attract rhinos, sometimes with tragic results. When the Chrissies come in, their female roommates ask them if they've ever heard of a zyxik. They repeat what they heard Robin/Jack say.
Chrissy's boyfriend Ian/Lloyd is coming over. She doesn't want games all over the couch/settee. Robin/Jack asks what Ian/Lloyd is coming over for then. Brit-Chrissy says she'll introduce Robin as her ex-sister. He queenily says she'd better be careful. "He might fancy me more than he fancies you." Amer-Chrissy says Jack has a one-track mind. He replies, "I don't care, just so long as it takes me where I wanna go."
While the Chrissies are out of the room, Robin/Jack asks Jo/Janet what Ian/Lloyd is like. Jo says Ian is ancient, at least 30, he even remembers Bill Hailey. Janet says Lloyd is ancient, at least 40, he remembers Chubby Checker. Robin says some of these 30-year-olds can be quite spritely. Jack says some of these 40-year-olds can still move around pretty good.
Jo/Janet thinks Chrissy is getting serious about Ian/Lloyd. It's been a few weeks now. Robin/Jack says Chrissy must be after his pension/ Social Security check.
Robin/Jack goes in the kitchen and offers to help Ian/Lloyd upstairs in his bathchair/wheelchair. Chrissy says, "At least he has some sophistication. I bet you don't know what that means." Robin replies, "Yes, I do. It means you cock your little finger when you scratch yourself," while Jack's answer is "You cover your mouth with one hand while you're picking your teeth with the other."
Brit-Chrissy says, "I just got fed up with spotty youths. A quick half of bitter and 'I know where there's an abandoned car.' " Ian drives a Maserati.
The Chrissies are cooking for their dates, and they don't want Robin/Jack to criticize. He says his lips are sealed, "and so will his be when he eats this stuff." Jack points out that Chrissy has never cooked before. (She mangled breakfast on the pilot, but she does cook much less than Jo.) The Chrissies say that Ian/Lloyd won't be looking at the food with them in those dresses. Brit-Chrissy is wearing a lowcut flower print dress, while Amer-Chrissy's dress is even more revealing.
Robin wonders what will happen if Ian "tries it on." She says, "It wouldn't fit him." She met Ian at Tesco's. She dropped her panties and he picked them up, paper panties that is. Amer-Chrissy met Lloyd at an unnamed supermarket. She dropped her liver and he picked it up. He also let her cut ahead of him at the check-out.
Jack: So he could get a better look at your rump roast?
Chrissy: I didn't buy any. (getting it) Oh, you!
Jo/Janet lets in Ian/Lloyd. Ian has a droopy moustache but doesn't look significantly older than Chrissy. In fact, this same actor, Norman Eshley much later returned as Robin's brother. He would've been 29 at the time of Math10. As for Lloyd, it's Dick Sargent, AKA "the other Darrin Stephens"! This was five years after Bewitched ended, and he was 47.
Ian/Lloyd says to Jo/Janet, "Chrissy didn't tell me you were beautiful." She says, "I like him," Jo adding, "He tells the truth." Robin/Jack introduces himself by his full name. Ian just says his last name, Cross, but Lloyd says, "Lloyd Cross." Jack says in a babyish voice, "Why? Did Mommy spank you?"
Ian/Lloyd says he heard Robin/Jack is at technical college, studying dressmaking. Robin/Jack corrects him, it's cooking. (Jack in particular is very defensive about it.) Ian/Lloyd says, "I knew it was something like that." (This exchange has an extra layer of irony on 3'sC, because Dick Sargent was gay and closeted at the time.)
To get back at Ian, Robin asks, "Do you remember Guy Mitchell as well?" ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guy_Mitchell )
Jack asks Lloyd, "Do you remember Bill Hailey and the Comets, too?" He sings "Rock Around the Clock," till Janet pulls his hair.
The Chrissies come in from the kitchen. Brit-Chrissy says, "Hello, Ian, this is Robin. Ian, this is Jo. Robin, Jo, this is goodbye." Amer-Chrissy says, "Lloyd, this is Jack. Lloyd, this is Janet. Jack, Janet, this is goodbye." As Robin/Jack and Jo/Janet leave, Robin/Jack says that they'll be just outside the keyhole.
Brit-Chrissy says that Robin was jealous. Ian says, "Let's give him something to be jealous about," and kisses her. Robin bursts in but averts his eyes. He came back for his cigarettes. As he leaves, Chrissy says, "See you later. After midnight!"
She and Ian kiss again. She says, "Look, if we keep this up, my broccoli will go all soft."
Lloyd tells Amer-Chrissy she looks beautiful. She says, "So do you!" They smooch without interruption, till she says a variation on the "broccoli" line.
White and Red: At the Mucky Duck, Jo and Robin look at the newspaper. They're trying to find a movie to go to. "We could go to the Estado. Diary of a Lust Box, continuous performance." Robin says they wouldn't let him in, "I haven't got my dirty mac with me." (In the sense of raincoat rather than condom.) The Rialto is showing an all-star cast of Irish labourers, pulling it down. (Explain please.)
Jo asks what they're going to do.
Robin: (with mischievous eyes) Finish up the half, find an abandoned car.
Jo: You never think of anything else.
Robin: Listen, I'm not the only one. You don't think Whatshismane has come round for meat and two veg, do you?
He expects to find a couple notches on the standard lamp when they get home.
Over at the Regal Beagle, Jack is worried about Chrissy. Janet asks if he's jealous.
Jo says Robin usually isn't jealous of Chrissy's boyfriends. (Was she not paying attention to the whole thing with Mark a couple episodes ago?) Robin/Jack denies he's jealous. He just doesn't like Ian/Lloyd's type, good-looking, well-off/charming, successful.
They consider seeing a movie. Jack says there's one playing down the street, Lust in the Dust. (This became the title of a John Waters movie eight years later, starring Divine and Tab Hunter.) Janet doesn't want to see a dirty movie. He says, "Dirty?!? Dirty is in the eye of the beholder." Then he does his pervert imitation.
The Ropers enter the pubs. They order drinks, on 3'sC with the old joke of "Two beers, Jim," "And I'll have a gin on the rocks."
George complains about Gestapo tactics, and Stanley says they're living in a police state. There's going to be a parking meter right outside the buildings. George says it'll cost him 40 quid a year just to park outside his home, while Stanley says it'll cost a fortune. Mildred suggests selling the car, which would cover the first year. George offers the car to Jim, but the landlord knows what a rattletrap it is. Helen thinks Stanley should just give the car away, because who would be dumb enough to buy it?
Robin: You see, Jo, there are two types of men. The ones you can trust--
Jo: And you.
Robin: And me. No! No! Him!
The Mr. Ropers go over to the kids' tables, Stanley with the beers, which Jack and Janet take. When George mentions his car, Robin says, "The cream and red Morris?" George says it's all cream, and you can touch up the rust. Jack says, "The white and red Chevy?" Helen says the red is rust.
The Mr. Ropers say that the car goes along smoothly. Jo/Janet says she's often seen Mrs. Roper pushing it. George/Stanley says it doesn't use a lot of petrol/gas. Mildred says that's because it's always breaking down, while Helen says, "That's 'cause I'm always pushing it."
The Mrs. Ropers tell their husbands that they haven't paid for the drinks yet. They advise the kids not to buy the cars, because if the cars go over cigarette ends/butts, the hubcaps fall off.
Jo/Janet says she likes Ian/Lloyd's Maserati. Mildred says she saw Mr. Cross getting out of it, while Helen calls him Lloyd Cross. Mildred knows him just to talk to at Tesco's, while Helen has met him once or twice. Mrs. Roper knows his wife better. The kids are very surprised to hear he has a wife.
George comes over and says, "Er, can I borrow a quid from next week's allowance, Mother?" Helen notices that the ice cubes have soaked up all her gin. She goes to get a refill, as Mildred also goes over to the bar.
Robin/Jack asks if Chrissy knows Ian/Lloyd is married. Jo/Janet is sure that Chrissy doesn't know. But Jack and Janet dash out, which makes Stanley happy. "I got 'em sold, Helen!"
A few words: Meanwhile at the flat/apartment, Chrissy and her date are drinking wine.
Ian: Mmm, a nice full body.
Chrissy: The wine?
Ian: Of course.
Lloyd: Lovely. Nice full body. Gorgeous color.
Chrissy: Yes, good wine.
Ian: That, too.
Brit-Chrissy says she doesn't know much about him. Ian says there isn't much to know. "Since I left the circus and won the V.C., it's just been a dull daily round of advising Dr. Kissinger." She says she was "stolen from my pram in the palace by Gypsies, raised by a she-wolf in Leavesden."
Brit-Chrissy/Amer-Chrissy thinks she and Ian/Lloyd should get to know each other better. He knows an incredibly quick way of doing that. She wants to know his hopes and ambitions. Well. His other hopes and ambitions.
Brit-Chrissy says she wouldn't be the first, would she? He says something like not unless she was at Skateness in 1932.*
Lloyd wants to warm up his lips if he's going to do all that talking.
As the couples kiss, the roommates return and get out the Scrabble board, Jack and Janet also turning on the lights. Brit-Chrissy points out that they weren't supposed to be back before midnight, while Amer-Chrissy says it's only 9:30. Jo/Janet thought of a great word she can use. Chrissy can think of a few words herself.
Ian/Lloyd excuses himself out, saying he had half of a lovely evening. Just outside the door, Ian says he wanted to get to bed early anyway. Chrissy says, "I know!" as if very disappointed. Lloyd and Amer-Chrissy go over to the door, and after he says the "bed" line, it's Jack who says, "We know."
Ian and Chrissy plan to get together tomorrow night at 8 at "their" restaurant. He says he's sorry the evening had to end. She says, "It hasn't ended yet. I've still got two people to strangle." He kisses her cheek and says, "Do it slowly."
Lloyd and Chrissy will also have dinner tomorrow night. He suggests picking her up at 7, but she says, "No, why don't we meet at the Regal Beagle? I don't like the element that's been hanging around here." Lloyd gives her just a peck on the lips goodnight, probably because Jack and Janet can see them.
Brit-Chrissy tells her flatmates, "I don't want to hear your explanation, and I'm not gonna believe it, but it had better be good!" Amer-Chrissy says something similar. Robin says, "He's married, Chris," I think the first time he shortens her name. Jack calls her Chrissy as usual when he tells her. Brit-Chrissy says, "You seriously expect-- he's what?" Amer-Chrissy says, "I thought you were my friends, but-- Married?" She says she doesn't believe it, but Janet says, "Believe it, Chrissy." It's a quiet, gentle, sad moment before they cut to commercial.
Business or pleasure?: On MatH they pop for a new set, rather than just using the pub. In a darkly lit restaurant, Ian waits for Chrissy. When she comes in, he stands up to greet her. She "accidentally" spills wine on him. On 3'sC, Lloyd is waiting in the side booth that gets used when they're not using the center table. Chrissy comes in wearing an off-the-shoulder dress. Brit-Chrissy looks nice but doesn't seem to be trying to dress sexy for her date anymore. Amer-Chrissy spills a drink on Lloyd when she sits down.
Ian says he's not much of a Scrabble buff, while Lloyd isn't crazy about Scrabble either. The Chrissies say that Robin/Jack came up with an interesting word.
The restaurant waiter comes to the table. Brit-Chrissy asks for a large custard pie with lots of cream on top, moving her hand as if she wants to throw something. Ian orders two dry sherries. Lloyd orders two glasses of Burgundy and a large napkin from the Regal Beagle barmaid.
Brit-Chrissy wants to go back to his place. He says they could. She's pleasantly surprised. Then he says it's being redecorated. She says, "I thought it might be," and she knocks over the water. As with all the spills, she pretends to be sorry. This time Ian says, "That's all right, I was wet anyway." The scene plays out much the same in America, except that Chrissy knocks over a small vase with a daisy in it.
Ian observes that there's nothing else to knock over, but then the waiter brings their sherries. Ian exclaims, "Oh God!" He takes the drinks and carefully sets them down. While he's holding his, Chrissy asks the time. He spills the sherry on himself while looking at his watch. She smiles. In the U.S., it's similar, except it's the waitress with the wine, and Chrissy isn't as obvious about her enjoyment.
Ian has a rather difficult question for her.
Ian: Do you know Bournemouth?
Chrissy: Yes. It wasn't difficult.
He says there's a business conference there. He knows this sounds like a subtle way of propositioning her. She says, "Well, it's not very subtle so far." His secretary has gone down with the flu and needs someone to take notes and shorthand. (And we now have confirmation that, like her American counterpart and like Jo, this Chrissy is a secretary.) She says she doesn't take shorthand. He says, "Well, they'll all speak very slowly."
He says it'll be purely business.
Chrissy: Oh, what a shame!
Ian: And we will have separate rooms of course.
Chrissy: Oh, I'd be frightened to sleep on my own.
Ian: (grinning) Pardon?
She says she has a nightdress she's never dared wear before. She wants his opinion on whether it's decent. He stutters. The waiter brings a fresh glass of sherry. She suggests rooms next to each other, with a connecting door. Ian says that, coincidentally, that's what they'll have.
Chrissy: Marvelous! There's just one little thing that mgiht spoil it for us.
Ian: What's that, Darling?
Chrissy: You're married!
This time he spills the drink.
Lloyd's business conference is in San Francisco. The scene lacks the parts with the "difficult question," "subtle," "very slowly," and "decent." Also, the scene ends differently. She says, "You're married, Darling," then toasts his glass, breaking it with hers. This moment produced a whole string of bloopers that can be seen from 2:10 to 4:36 on this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LluGUEdJkkE . Historical note, at about the 3:50 mark, Suzanne Somers accidentally invents the Chrissy-snort.
Ring: Jo/Janet thinks married men ought to made to wear a ring. Robin/Jack says they could always take it off. Jo/Janet says, "Not if it was through their nose." As suits their different characters, Jo giggles as she says it, while Janet is doing her tough-girl thing. (And the joke has dated in unforeseen ways, since who knew that nose piercings would become so common in Western culture?) Jack serves fattening creamy pastry that he made.
The Chrissies come back from their dates early. Robin/Jack asks what Ian/Lloyd did when Chrissy told him she knew he was married.
Brit-Chrissy: He went home to change his trousers. (Robin covers his face briefly in amusement.)
Robin: Affected him that badly, did it?
Amer-Chrissy: He went home to change his pants.
Jack: Now that's class.
Chrissy/Chrissy: But first he told me something I didn't know.
Robin/Jack: Yeah? What?
Chrissy/Chrissy: He's divorced!
Brit-Chrissy puts the lampshade over Robin's head, while Amer-Chrissy tips Jack's pastry onto his nose.
This is when MatH cuts to the adverts, showing a difference in emphasis and what they consider worthy of a cliffhanger compared to the American version. The scene continues on 3'sC, with Chrissy saying that Lloyd has been divorced for over a year.
When MatH returns, the girls are talking as they wash the dishes. On 3'sC, the girl talk happens while Jack goes to "change into a clean face." Jo/Janet asks if Chrissy minds about Ian/Lloyd being married before. She says that they've got a second-hand record player/ radio, but it still makes beautiful msuic. "Yeah, but it takes ages to warm up." Chrissy says, "Well, he doesn't."
Robin comes in from the loo. Chrissy says she thought he might've cut his throat. He tried but it was "a very slow process with an electric razor." We find out she lacquered his face towel.
Jack also returns from the bathroom, and he and Robin say they'll stop knocking Lloyd and Ian. Then the Chrissies tell him about going to Bournemouth/San Francisco for the weekend. Now Robin/Jack wants to knock Ian/Lloyd flat on his face.
Jack storms out, but Robin sticks around long enough to scoff that it sounds more like a dirty weekend than a business trip.
Chrissy: He's promised not to lay a finger on me.
Robin: A finger. What about the other nine?
He says if she's going to do it, she should do it with her eyes open. She says, "Which manual is that in?"
Janet: Look, Chrissy, you know I don't like to interfere--
Chrissy: Then don't!
Janet says Chrissy is too trusting.
Brit-Chrissy/Amer-Chrissy says that it's only a business trip, and even if it's not, it's her affair, well, not affair. Both Chrissies are flustered and get tangled in their words. They leave the room. Robin tells Jo, "That'll teach you to interfere."
Quarter to 3: At the Mucky Duck, Jim says it's a quarter to 3 (presumably p.m.). So Robin starts singing the song in a deep American accent. He's smoking again.
Mrs. Roper is the one singing at the Regal Beagle and she's clearly drunk. Her husband wants to go home. She says, "What can we do at home that we can't do here?" He wants to play Monopoly.
Stanley: I consider Monopoly a very interesting game.
Helen: Yeah, I know, you brought it along on our honeymoon.
Stanely: I thought it would help kill time.
She says in two weeks he didn't pass Go once.
She's wearing a new dress, like all her dresses a muumuu or similar. To her surprise, he says he likes it. Then he says it hides her knees. He does a fourth-wall-break laugh.
The other Ropers go to the Mucky Duck. (She has an awesome shiny black coat and actually looks a bit sexy, which Helen never does, in her unflattering clothes.) Mildred is scolding him about betting on horses. He says, "Nagging Biddy, it was an omen." Jim says the horse that'll win is Once a Year. Mildred says, "If you're looking for omens, George."
Jack goes to the Regal Beagle. George/Stanley asks Robin/Jack if he's made up his mind about the car. He's got several people interested in it. Mildred says, "Yeah, including the police," while Helen says, "Including a couple junk dealers." Helen calls the car "a cat's watering hole," an odd turn of phrase.
Mr. Roper hands Robin/Jack the keys. George says there might be a rattle from the choke knob, because it's in the glove compartment. Helen says the hand brake is in the glove compartment. Stanley says that's only to prevent it from being stolen.
Mildred says, "The girls not with you?" and Helen suggests Jack bring the girls along in the car. Robin/Jack says that Chrissy is upset with him, and it's actually Mrs. Roper's fault for saying Mr. Cross was married, when he's actually divorced. The Mrs. Ropers look surprised and confused.
More fun: Meanwhile, the Chrissies are packing for the weekend. Jo/Janet asks what she'll do if it's not all business, what if it's overtime? Brit-Chrissy says she'll cross that bridge when she gets to it, while Amer-Chrissy says "burn that bridge."
Chrissy/Chrissy: Why does everyone always think the worst?
Jo/Janet: It's more fun that way.
Amer-Chrissy says Lloyd has never laid a finger on her. Instead of asking about the other nine fingers, Janet talks about going out with Jerry DaVucci. The first time, he shook her hand. The second time, he gave her a peck on the cheek. The third time, he said he wanted to get to know the real her, so he started to rip off her clothes. This is similar to when Brit-Chrissy on Math3 told Jo about the "shy" man she dated, where the third date was "like King Kong meets Godzilla."
Robin/Jack comes home. Chrissy warns that if he says one word about Ian/Lloyd, she'll stick the umbrella up his trousers/pants and open it. The American audience is very amused.
Robin/Jack just wonders what time Ian/Lloyd is picking her up. Ian will be there at 5.00, presumably p.m., while Amer-Chrissy is leaving in the morning. Robin/Jack says there's time for a trial run in the Ropers' car. Chrissy says she doesn't know anything about cars. He says that's what he wants, a totally uninformed opinion. Besides, if no one's in the passenger seat, the car tilts sideways.
Quite a large place: We get an exterior shot of a cream-coloured car lurching down the street, Robin and Chrissy inside. After he parks the car, she says he can't seriously want to buy this rattletrap. He actually wants to look at a house for sale.
Chrissy: (smiling) Hey, is this some sort of proposal?
Robin: You must be kidding.
They get out of the car and go to the door. She asks, "Have you gone round the bend?"
On 3'sC, we see a fake set of the outside of a house, with a for sale sign. Chrissy says, "Are you crazy? Where are we gonna get money to buy a house?"
Robin/Jack rings the bell. A woman answers. He addresses her as Mrs. Cross. On MatH there's a close-up of Chrissy looking puzzled.
Mrs. Cross invites them in. Jack quietly tells Chrissy, "Mrs. Lloyd Cross. That's his wife." Mrs. Cross wonders if the estate agent/ real estate agent sent them. No, Mrs. Roper told them about the house. Brit-Mrs. Cross says, "Oh, Mildred, yes," while Amer-Mrs. Cross says, "Oh, Helen, that's nice." Now we get Robin quietly telling Chrissy, "Mrs. Ian Cross, that's his wife." We see a picture of the Crosses together.
Mrs. Cross apologizes about the mess. She's packing for her husband, who's going on a business trip in Bournemouth/ San Francisco. Robin tells an awkward story of his mum visiting Bournemouth when she was carrying him.
Mrs. Cross: Yes, it's quite a large place. My husband redecorated it all himself.
Chrissy: (still shocked) Bournemouth.
Mrs. Cross: No, the house.
Jack: Ah, San Francisco.
Mrs. Cross: Uh, it's quite a large place. My husband redecorated it all by himself.
Chrissy: (looking down at the suitcase) San Francisco, huh?
Mrs. Cross: No, the house.
Robin/Jack says they've seen all they need to.
Brit-Chrissy: It's lovely. And you're lovely, too.
Mrs. Cross: Well, I won't be staying.
She is lovely, although I can't find that Audrey Nicholson was in anything else that an American might've seen. The Amer-Mrs. Cross is more "wifely-looking," cute more than pretty, and in a wholesome way. It's entirely fitting that she's played by Joyce Bulifant, best known as Marie Slaughter, Murray's wife on The Mary Tyler Moore Show. She also was the first Carol Brady cast, until Sherwood Schwartz got Ann B. Davis as Alice and wanted the mom to be more of a straight woman than Ms. Bulifant, who can deliver punch lines with ease. Audrey Nicholson on the other hand has a sophistication about her that makes her match up well with Norman Eshley, just as having two recognizable sitcom spouses makes the Sargent-Bulifant match work.
Mrs. Cross says they haven't seen the rest of the house. There's the main/master bedroom and the children's room. They have two children and a bit/quarter, which is why they're moving to a bigger place.
Chrissy looks unwell, so Mrs. Cross goes to get her some tea/coffee. Brit-Chrissy has sunk onto the sofa. Robin sits on the sofa arm and pats her shoulder. He says, "I'm sorry, Chrissy. But would you have believed me if I hadn't brought your round here?" Jack says, ""I'm sorry I had to do it this way, Chrissy, but if I hadn't brought you here, would you have believed me?" Both Chrissies exclaim, "I was nearly the other woman!"
Ian comes home. When his wife greets him, he calls her Darling and kisses her cheek. Lloyd calls from offscreen, asking about the packing. Mrs. Cross tells her husband that there's a young couple there to see about the house. Ian sounds happy, until he comes in and sees Chrissy and Robin. Lloyd is so startled that he drops the article of clothing he was presumably bringing in to be packed. Speaking of clothing, there's a nice visual with him in a striped shirt on the same side of the screen with his wife in her striped slacks, while Chrissy is in tan slacks and Jack is in a tan shirt.
Mrs. Cross introduces her husband to the young couple. Robin/Jack and Chrissy introduce themselves, since they haven't told her their names. Robin/Jack says she's been telling them Ian/Lloyd is off to Bournemouth/San Francisco for a weekend business trip.
Mrs. Cross: I usually go with him to take notes, but this time he's got a temporary.
Chrissy: A temporary what?
Both Ian and Lloyd are very flustered during this scene, and this makes them even more flustered.
Chrissy says there's something very familiar about Ian/Lloyd's face.
Ian: Probably the nose. A lot of people have noses. Like this one. I've often thought of having it altered.
Chrissy: I might be able to help you there.
Mrs. Cross: We had it double-glazed last year. The house I mean, not his-- Do you two know each other?
Ian: No!
Chrissy: No. I thought we might but we don't.
Lloyd: Oh, yeah, you know, I have that kind of face, you know. It's, uh, a very ordinary face. You've probably seen hundreds like 'em.
Chrissy: (with meaning) Yes, it's very common.
Lloyd tries to signal to Chrissy not to give him away. His wife turns around so he pretends to dust off her clothes. Then there's the "do you two know each other" dialogue.
Robin and Chrissy get up to go. Ian says he'll see them out.
Chrissy: (to Mrs. Cross) I'm sorry.
Mrs. Cross: Oh, that's all right. I'm sure somebody else will be along soon.
Chrissy: Yes, so am I. That's why I'm sorry.
They have the same conversation on 3'sC, but the phone rings after and Mrs. Cross goes to get it, so that's when Lloyd sees them out.
In the entryway, Ian stutters and says he appreciates Chrissy not saying anything to his wife. She says, "It's not her fault she's married to a rat." She dumps the tea on his head and he says, "Thank you." The scene is similar on 3'sC, except that they're closer to the front door, she pours coffee, and he doesn't thank her. After Chrissy leaves, Jack says, "That coffee really hits the spot, doesn't it, Lloyd?" On MatH, Mrs. Cross comes in right after Robin and Chrissy leave.
Mrs. Cross: Would you like a cup of tea, Dear?
Ian: Er, I've already had one.
C.C.: Back at the flat/apartment, both Chrissies are off men. Robin queenily says to think of him as one of the girls. Brit-Chrissy says, "Oh, well, there's at least one good thing. If I had married him, I'd have had to go through life as Chrissy Cross."
She says that men are only interested in one thing.
Jo: Yeah, same as us.
Chrissy: Not me, not anymore.
Jo asks what Chrissy would do if Steve McQueen came knocking on the door. Then there's a knock. Robin says, "Actually, he is in town at the moment."
Janet asks what Chrissy would do if Robert Redford came to the door. Would she send him away? Chrissy says yes, because she'd have to fix her hair and makeup first.
Jo answers the door and it's Mr. Roper. He asks about the car. Robin says they're not really interested, not with a meter being put out front. Chrissy pulls the handbrake out of her chair and the episode ends with everybody inaudibly talking about it.
Jack comes out of the bathroom, brushing his teeth. He tells Chrissy she's lucky. "If you'd've married that guy, you'd have to go through your whole life as Chrissy Cross." The girls stare at him. He casually leans back, as if to put his hand on the door, but he misses and falls.
Commentary: If Ian/Lloyd is an older man, how old are the Chrissies? We know that Brit-Chrissy is under 30, if Ian is "ancient." Paula Wilcox was 24 at the time, and I doubt her character was any older than that, especially if she's still dating "spotty youths." Probably at least 20, since she's been living away from home for awhile. Suzanne Somers is actually older than Paula W., having been born in 1946, turning 31 a few days after this episode aired. I really doubt Amer-Chrissy is supposed to be in her 30s, but I don't imagine her to be past mid 20s. The change of age difference from six to ten years in England to more like sixteen to twenty also changes the dynamic, makes Lloyd more sleazy. Also, as Janet points out, Amer-Chrissy is very trusting, which can not be said of sophisticated Brit-Chrissy. Both Chrissies get their hearts broken, but with the British one it's because she decided to trust a man for once, while the American one is vulnerable to begin with.
One reason why I'm so fond of this pair of episodes is for what they do for the Brit-Chrissy/Robin and Amer-Chrissy/Jack dynamics. Brit-Chrissy is more than aware that Robin fancies her, especially after the snogging downstairs at the Ropers' a couple episodes ago. Robin may deny his jealousy to Jo, but Chrissy can even talk about it to Ian, although she doesn't seem to take it too seriously. (This is, incidentally, the first episode where I get a vibe that Richard O'Sullivan and Sally Thomsett have started their secret relationship. Their body language and line deliveries.)
The Amer-Chrissy/Jack chemistry is more ambiguous. There's attraction but not as strong as for Brit-Chrissy/Robin, and of course they won't have their "party downstairs" moment on "Three's Christmas." Jack is jealous of Lloyd, but as much for his smoothness and success as for his dating Chrissy. (There seemed to be more jealousy towards Michael Winthrop.)
The way the flatmates/roommates try to protect the Chrissies is both funny and surprisingly poignant. Janet always has a big-sister attitude towards trusting Chrissy (you know she doesn't mean it when she says she doesn't like to interfere), while Jo is more like a teasing kid sister, yet it's clear they both care. But it's how the male roommates act that really makes these episodes special. Yes, Robin and Jack are jealous, but they're also protective. The way Robin calls Chrissy "Chris" conveys a kind bluntness, while Jack tells Chrissy the bad news in a gentle manner that's surprising after all his snark to and about Lloyd.
MatH offers more of a reason to initially like Mr. Cross, since he and Chrissy wittily make up their backgrounds. On 3'sC, Lloyd kisses Chrissy instead. Of course, Dick Sargent is a very likable guy (except to rabid Dick York fans), and that comes across, particularly in the bloopers. Ian/Lloyd does put Robin/Jack down, but there's a sense that Jack deserves it, with his cracks about Lloyd's age. Ian and Lloyd still come across as much more pleasant than Michael the cook or Mark the actor. It sounds funny that Chrissy is serious about Mr. Cross after only a few weeks, but that is admittedly longer than most relationships last on these shows. The British couple have at least been going out long enough to have "their" restaurant.
There's more of a feeling on MatH that Chrissy is going to be taking a big step if she goes to bed with Ian. She's a virgin, or at least inexperienced. She won't be his first, which is confirmed when she finds out he's "divorced." Neither Chrissy is worried about him being "second-hand," but they're probably mostly relieved to find out he's not married anymore, or so he says. On MatH, Chrissy seems more tempted, as with her disappointed "I know!" about Ian not getting to bed early. Jo's "Yeah, same as us" acknowledges in a matter-of-fact way what 3'sC never quite admits, that even "nice girls" are interested in sex, whether or not they actually have any.
It's interesting in terms of writing structure that there are two big reveals that happen offscreen. We don't see Ian/Lloyd telling Chrissy he's divorced, and we don't see Mrs. Roper telling Robin/Jack that no, actually he's still married, which she would know since she knows Mrs. Cross. (It would've been easy to include Mrs. Cross's name, but I think the writers on both shows wanted her to be a shadowy figure, just The Wife.) I like that Amer-Chrissy says that Lloyd has been divorced for over a year, because this gives it even more of a punch when Mrs. Cross says she's "one-quarter" pregnant.
Both Chrissies express their anger in indirect ways, Brit-Chrissy threatening to strangle her flatmates, but just putting a lamp on Robin's head, and later threatening to "alter" Ian's nose. Amer-Chrissy would probably win her over by what she does to Jack's pastry. And both Chrissies spill various forms of liquid on Ian and Lloyd, and not as Mr. Cross was hoping.
When Robin takes Chrissy to the Crosses', she teases him that it's a proposal, while Amer-Chrissy seems to think of it as a house for all three of them. On each program, we see that the male roommate wants to take care of Chrissy, which she appreciates, but she can also stand up for herself, pouring more liquid on her now ex-boyfriend. She swears off men, celebrities excepted, for the moment anyway.
It's interesting that Jack not only gets the last word with Lloyd, but he gets the "Chrissy Cross" joke.
A couple other notable things about these episodes. People play board games a lot on these two programs. Not only is there Scrabble, but we get the "Monopoly on honeymoon" bit from "Some Enchanted Evening" on 3'sC11, modified since it's not in front of the kids.
We still get the Ropers insulting each other, even though on neither episode do we see the Ropers at home, just at the pub. Helen drinks more than usual this episode, with her ice cubes soaking up the gin and her later singing at the bar. The line "Er, can I borrow a quid from next week's allowance, Mother?" shows that, despite all George's bravado on the previous episode, he's almost like a little boy with his wife. (On the episode "Helen's Job," later in the second season, we find out that Helen is the one with the allowance, and she, egged on by Janet, tries to become more independent.)
This is of course not the first time we've heard about Mr. Roper's rattletrap car, and on 3'sC at least it won't be the last.
*Apparently Skegness is a popular seaside resort on the east coast of England: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skegness . Of course, if Ian and Chrissy had lost their virginities there in 1932, that would make them at least mid-50s at the time of this episode.
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