Monday, June 6, 2011

"The Tender Trap"

This absolutely charming episode could never have been adapted for 3'sC, for reasons that will soon become apparent.  It takes its title from the 1955 movie starring Frank Sinatra and Debbie Reynolds, which in turn was based on a stage play.  This episode aired on 3 April 1975, a significant date since it allows for a great deal of chronology.

Anything of value:  We open with Robin in the kitchen, not only trying to mend a radio but reeling off a bunch of jargon about it.
Jo:  Are you sure you know what you're doing?
Robin:  I don't even know what I'm saying!

When he asks for some piece whose name he and I have never heard of, she immediately hands it to him.  She says it was just a lucky guess.

Chrissy comes in, skeptical about Robin's radio-mending skills.  Jo tells her that right in the middle of Pete Murray, the radio just spluttered and died.  Chrissy says he wasn't getting any younger.  (Ironically, d.j. Pete Murray is still alive at 85.)

When Robin doesn't recognise one item on the table, Chrissy says it's one of her heated rollers.  (Perhaps left in the kitchen after Jo defrosted?)

Chrissy:  Honestly, if I had anything of value, I wouldn't let him anywhere near it.
Robin:  Yes, you've made that perfectly clear, Chrissy, many, many times.

She tells him to clear up before her mother arrives.  Robin says it's a good thing she didn't share a flat with old Isaac Newton.  Gravity wouldn't have been invented and we'd all be sucked out into space.

Chrissy says her mother "comes here to see the way I live and I'm determined she's not going to."  Jo says Mrs. Plummer comes to see Chrissy and won't care how the flat looks.  Robin says she lives on a farm and is used to pig sties.

Robin finishes with the radio and turns it on.  He and Chrissy put their heads close together to listen.  They're confused when they hear Chamberlain talking about Hitler.

Der Fuehrer's Face:  Downstairs at the Ropers', the radio is tuned to the same programme about WWII.  Mildred says it takes you back.  George recalls shouting defiance at the woman across the street, who was German, or Swiss, or French.  Well, she was foreign anyway.  Chuckling, he says, "We got her cat."

He sings a bit of "Der Fuehrer's Face," with a raspberry of course.  He goes through some sheet music, because there's going to be a British Legion concert next Saturday. 

She won't go since he's singing.  She'll have a headache and claims that he always has one when she wants to do something.

He thinks she's jealous. 
George:  You don't like the spotlight falling on me.
Midlred:  Now that I'd come to see.

He has 20 tickets to get rid of.

We go out to the entryway, where Robin invites Chrissy down to the pub.  She says she can't greet her mother smelling of lager and lime.  He suggests a breath freshener, but she says her mother would smell that and think she's been on the gin.  He suggests vodka, since it doesn't smell of anything and you just keep falling over but nobody knows why.  She hands him two glasses and says, "Push off."  (Can you carry alcohol out of a pub if you provide your own glasses?)

George comes out of his flat and invites her to the concert.  Mildred follows after a bit and suggests that Chrissy will be washing her hair, which Chrissy uses as an excuse.  George asks about the young fellow, whatshisname.  (Good grief, Robin's been living there over a year and a half, and George still doesn't know his name?)  Chrissy says Mr. Roper will have to ask Robin himself.

Worries:  We next see Chrissy upstairs, finding rubbish in the settee.  She pulls out a thrupenny bit (3 pennies, or pence).  Since that coin was discontinued in 1971, Jo says it must be worth a pound.  Chrissy says no, a pound is worth about a thrupence.

Jo is going down to the shops, so Chrissy asks her to pop into the hairdresser's, since Chrissy hasn't got the time.  Jo is a bit confused but as usual takes everyting in stride.  She asks what style Chrissy wants.  Chrissy wants a bottle of setting lotion.

They talk about Chrissy's mother, who worries about her.  When Jo says Chrissy worries about her mother, Chrissy says, "I only worry about her worrying about me."  Her mother asks when she's going to get married, if she's eating enough, when she's going to get married, if she's wearing her winter woolies (thermal underwear), and when she's going to get married.

The doorbell rings and Jo answers.  She and Mrs. Plummer exchange a cheek kiss.  When Mrs. Plummer asks how she is, Jo says, "Well, I'm eating very well and I'm wearing my winter woolies."  She leaves with a slightly mischievous smile. 
Mrs. Plummer:  Now there's a sensible girl.
Chrissy:  (as her mum kisses her cheek) Yeah, but I can't help worrying when she's gonna get married.

Daphne Oxenford is reprising her role as Mrs. Plummer.  She did a TV-movie way back in 1949 and apparently is still alive at the age of 91 or 92, having played the Queen Mother in a 2002 TV-movie called Prince William.  In between, she did a lot of Coronation Street, among other credits.

Mrs. Plummer has packages from shopping.  She's been combing London, looking for Mr. Plummer's socks, those hairy things he wears.  She thought they "became illegal when we joined the Common Market."

Her husband sent Chrissy a package of pig's trotters, since you don't see a lot in London.  Chrissy says, "Yeah, that's mainly why I came to live here."

Mrs. Plummer says it's taken years off her husband becoming a grandfather.  Susan's named the baby after him.  Chrissy says, "She's called it Dad?"  No, she's named it Dudley after him.

Mrs. Plummer bought "the most gorgeous christening gown" for next Saturday.  It's a family heirloom, since they have to start somewhere.

Mrs. Plummer wrote about the christening in a letter, which she now hands to Chrissy.  There's no point in wasting a stamp.  Chrissy says, "I'll tell you what, I'll write a letter confirming it and bring it home with me."

The same vicar who married Susan and her husband is doing the christening.  "Talking of marriage."  Chrissy tries to distract her mother by going in the kitchen to make tea, but her mother follows.
Mrs. Plummer:  The vicar keeps saying, "When's your Chrissy going to tie the knot?"
Chrissy:  Listen, I'm not getting knotted just to please the vicar.  There's no panic.  I know I'm doddering up to 21, but some men prefer older women.

From the online Urban Dictionary:
British slang, not that common any more.
An insult, Knotted makes reference to either your guts or your willy. Always acompanied by 'Get...'.
"Get Knotted, you bastard".
"He can go get Knotted".

I'm surprised to find that after all this time Chrissy is still only 20.  (Unless of course she's lying to her mother, but that seems extremely unlikely.)  This means she was born between April 1954 and March of 1955, probably at the earlier end.  She was only 18 or 19 at the time of "In Praise of Older Men."  She was also 18 or 19 when we met her.  And at the time her three-year lease expired, she was 19 or 20, meaning she moved to London at 16 or 17, presumably right out of school, pig's trotters or not.

Her mother "changes the subject" to "Where's that nice young man you share with, Robin?"  Chrissy sees through her, but her mother keeps going.  She asks if Robin is engaged, so Chrissy says, "No, still vacant," as if he's a flat.

As Robin comes home, Chrissy asks her mother not to drop hints about marriage.  Mrs. Plummer innocently says, "Me?"

Robin comes in and gives Mrs. Plummer a kiss on the cheek.  She tells him about buying her husband socks and says, "I don't suppose you've got anyone to darn your socks."  Chrissy tells her to "never discuss politics, religion, or socks."

Robin:  How are things in Cornwall?
Mrs. Plummer:  They're probably very nice, but we live in Sussex.
He says the nearest he's been is Exeter.  Chrissy says, "You're nearer than that now."

Mrs. Plummer says that Chrissy will be down next weekend for the christening.  Chrissy says it's her sister's baby.  Robin says, "How nice."
Mrs. Plummer:  Do you like babies?
Chrissy:  Mother!
Robin:  (confused) She didn't mention socks.

Mrs. Plummer invites him down as well.  "I'm sure your father would love to meet him."  Chrissy says Robin is terribly busy at weekends.  For one thing, he washes his hair.  And that weekend, "Mr. Roper's got plans for you, very exciting."  Robin is further confused.

Wuthering Heights:  At the Ropers', she's reading Wuthering Heights and wearing a blue top and blue slacks, the latter with what appear to be bananas!  George is trying out a song, but it turns out she's wearing earplugs.

Robin knocks and lets himself in.  He asks about the very exciting plans.  George tells him about the British Legion concert next Saturday.  Robin says he's busy but has trouble coming up with an excuse.  Mildred tries to signal him, but he thinks she's just scratching her head.  He says he's going to spend the weekend with Chrissy's parents.  She's says that's even better than washing your hair.

Fetlocks:  Back in the kitchen upstairs, Mrs. Plummer says it'll be a quiet weekend in the country.  Chrissy says it won't be quiet. 
Chrissy:  You'd keep nattering on about what a lovely wife I'd make someone.  I don't want to be put up at a cattle auction.  "Here's my daughter, 130 pounds of prime breeding stock."
Mrs. Plummer:  Oh, you've put on weight.

Chrissy says Robin doesn't like the countryside.  When he returns, she wants him to confirm this, but he exclaims, "I love it!"

Mrs. Plummer says Robin will meet Chrissy's sister, who's married although younger.  (So married and a mum by 19?)  Chrissy is annoyed about the hint-dropping, so her mother goes to freshen up.
Chrissy stands next to Robin and waves her pointer finger at him warningly. 
Chrissy:  You're gonna regret this.
Robin:  Don't point that at me, it might go off.

She says her family will spend the whole weekend examining him.  In an amused American voice, he says, "Oh, really?"
Chrissy:  They're all in farming and they know what to look for.
Robin:  (waving his pointer at her as Jo comes in) I'll match my fetlocks with the best of 'em.
(A fetlock is the joint on a horse's leg just behind the hoof, or the hair that grows at this joint, hence the "locks.")

Mr. Roper just tried to give Jo a ticket to the concert, but she said no.  Robin asks how she got out of it.  Forthright Jo says, "I told him it sounded boring and I didn't want to go."  She exits.

Chrissy tells Robin that her mother will spend the whole weekend match-making them.  He says, "Awww!" as if he thinks this is cute.  Then he teases that he can't stay a bachelor all his life.  "She might just talk me into it."  He tries to snuggle up against Chrissy.  She's annoyed, but then they nuzzle faces as we go to a break.

Pater:  The next scene is set at a British Railways station.  She says her father will be here to meet them.  Robin asks if it's all right if he calls him Dad.  Then he suggests Pater and Pops.

They go over to the car.  Chrissy introduces her father, but we get a close-up of a pig.  Robin is taken aback, while Chrissy's amused.

Trapped:  The following scene is set in the large lounge or den of Chrissy's childhood home.  Her dad may be a farmer, but don't picture Pa Kettle.  The room looks gorgeous and old-fashioned, not just the furniture but the fireplace and vases of flowers.  We can catch a glimpse of the green countryside through the windows. 

Mrs. Plummer quickly exits as Robin, Chrissy, and Mr. Plummer come in the front door, Chrissy and her dad embracing.

Mr. Plummer asks if Robin minded riding with the pig in his lap.  Robin says he's glad it wasn't the cow.

Chrissy says it's nice to be home.  Her father doesn't understand why she left.  What's London got to offer?  She suggests, "Hairy socks?"  He's played by Glynn Edwards, the ex-husband of Yootha Joyce!  He's younger than both Yootha and Daphne Oxenford, being only 44 at the time of this episode.  He often played policemen.

Chrissy's father has her sit down while he goes to put the car away.  Robin stands by the mantelpiece and says he can see he'll be marrying into money.  He sings a dopey farmer song.  He's amused by this situation.  She's sorry she ever told him.

Her mother comes in and asks about their train ride.  Robin says it was first-class (meaning excellent) although they rode second-class.

Mrs. Plummer mentions Susan, and Robin says, "Ah, yes, she's younger than Chrissy but married."  Robin says he loves babies and asks Chrissy, "Wouldn't you like a baby?"  She says, "Not just at the moment."  He thinks triplets would be nice.  She says, "Yeah, one of each."

Mrs. Plummer says Esmeralda had ten last week.  Chrissy explains that this is the pig.

Chrissy suggests they talk about the Common Market, so her mother says that she was reading that in France and Italy people are getting married younger than ever before.

As Mr. Plummer comes in, Chrissy has her mum go in the kitchen with her to make tea.  He doesn't want any, preferring something stronger. 

Rather than Pater or Pops, Robin calls him Mr. Plummer, and he says to call him Dudley.  He offers Robin home-made elderberry wine or a drop of malt whiskey.  Robin says he's torn.  Dudley says, "No, you're not, but you're tactful."

Dudley says, "You're planning to marry our Chrissy, are you?"  Robin says he's not, although he respects her of course.  Dudley says he didn't think Robin was.

They drink as they talk, and Robin turns out to be a real lightweight.  Dudley says Robin doesn't know what he let himself in for.  Young Ted, Susan's husband, was like Robin.  He came down here for a quiet weekend, and he was engaged when he left.  Robin says, "That's not likely to happen to me."  Dudley says those were Ted's exact words.  If Mrs. Plummer thinks Robin is right for our Chrissy, he might as well book the organist.

Robin says he's too young for marriage.  (It's still not clear how old he is.  Probably not more than a few years older than Chrissy.)  Dudley understands and rhetorically asks, "Why stick to one kind of licorice when you can have allsorts?"  They laugh together like mates.

Dudley says young people these days sleep together at the drop of a hat.  Robin says that's true, well, sometimes.  He says he hasn't with Chrissy.  He confides, "Mind you, Dudley, it's not for want of trying."  Dudley is no longer matey but a protective father, "You mean you tried to sleep with my daughter?"  Robin babbles an explanation.

Susan and Ted come in, he with a baby carrier.  Ted is a young blond in a suit and tie, I think because of the christening.  John Colclough had previously appeared on MatH as Nigel in "I Won't Dance."  Susan has brown hair in a similar style to Chrissy's and we'll later see that they're close in height.  They look more like each other than either looks like the parents.  Sheila Dunion didn't do much television, but she was in Frankenstein and the Monster from Hell with all those people from the MatH movie.

Dudley introduces Robin, then Susan says she'll take Dudley in the kitchen, since he seems to have wet himself again.  Robin thinks she means Mr. Plummer and then realises, "Oh, Dudley the baby!"

After Susan leaves with little Dudley, Ted asks if Robin is a friend of Chrissy's.  Robin says yes, he's down for the weekend, just like Ted.  He laughs.  He says he's just been hearing about it.  He drinks some more.  He says, "Mind you, I have no intention of getting trapped into marriage.  I'll be more careful."  Ted indignantly says, "Look, Mate, that baby's only three months old.  We've been married a year!" 

(This puts Ted and Susan's wedding during the gap between Series Two and Three.  Did Chrissy go to Sussex while Larry was staying in the flat?  It seems more likely the wedding was before.  And the baby was born around the new year.)

Robin babbles and says that Dudley told him Ted was trapped.  Dudley says he said nothing of the sort.  Ted says this is practically slander. 

Chrissy comes in with a tea tray and asks Robin, "Have you been making friends with everyone?"  He says, "Well, sort of."

 That's what I say:  Back at the Ropers', she's wearing a green scarf and green slacks, which goes well with her cutting flowers.  He's still going through sheet music.  One song is a bit high for his voice, so she says, "Well, if I can be of any help, George," and flourishes her shears.

She suggests he sing something more modern, something with more meaning for the people of today, like "(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction."

She's still not going, so he says he could order her to go.  She's amused and dares him to order her.  She says then she might do it, or she might flatten him.

He says he's gotten rid of one ticket.

Then we see him talking to Jo in the entryway, and she asks if he put the ticket under her door.  He says there's no charge.  She says she's going out with her boyfriend then.  So he gives her another ticket.

Bloomed:  Chrissy, her family, and Robin return from the christening.  Chrissy says, "Honestly, Mum, you cry at a harvest festival."  Amused, Susan says that another five mintues and the fonts would've overflowed.

"It's Norman you know," Mrs. Plummer says of the church, but Robin thinks she means the vicar.

Chrissy looks at the baby as her sister holds him, but then Susan passes her Dudley because he's about to poo-poo.  Susan is going to get a new nappie.

There's a close-up of Dudley.  Robin says he has his mummy's eyes and chin.  Chrissy says he also has his mum's nose.
Chrissy:  I don't think he's got anything of yours, Ted.
Ted:  Eh?
Chrissy:  Well, not that you can see anyway.

Mrs. Plummer looks at Chrissy and Robin with the baby and says to her husband, "Don't they make a lovely picture?"  He says to not rush, because she has the whole weekend.

Susan wants Ted to learn to change the baby.  He's reluctant, so she says it's no different than mucking out a cowshed.

After they exit, Mrs. Plummer says that Susan's bloomed since she got married.  Chrissy says she would rather wait a few years before having children.  Her mother asks Robin how he feels about that.  Chrissy says it's got nothing to do with him. 

To tease Chrissy, Robin says the more the merrier, the quicker the better.  He'd like eleven, with a tall one to be the goalkeeper, as in football.  Mrs. Plummer says, "You'd need a big house," and says there's one for sale at the edge of the village.  Chrissy leads her off for a word.  Mr. Plummer says they're going to finalise the date.  He pours Robin some champagne.

In the kitchen, Chrissy says Robin doesn't want to get married.  Her mother says, "It doesn't sound like that to me."  Chrissy says he's taking the mickey.  Her mother says, "You're no judge of character."  And she says she's invited the vicar for tea tomorrow.

Back in the den, Robin says Chrissy has a great sense of humour.  He sees her return, so he starts talking about roses round the cottage door, a pipe and slippers, and a casserole. 

She moves towards him with an empty vase.  He picks up another champagne glass and says, "You wouldn't hit a man with glasses, would you?"

The phone rings and Chrissy answers.  It's Jo calling about the gold earrings she loaned Chrissy.  She can't find them.  Chrissy pretends that the flat has flooded, with a burst water tank, and the whole ceiling down.  Jo says, "No, gold earrings."  Chrissy says they'll come straight back, catch the next train.

Tea caddy:  We next see Jo fixing her make-up in the lounge mirror.  Chrissy and Robin return.  Robin pretends to be impressed that Jo dried up the whole floor and replastered the ceiling, all in two hours.  Chrissy says, "I just couldn't stand another day of you and my mother."  Jo says it's all right, she found the earrings in the tea caddy.

Mr. Roper lets himself in without knocking.  He saw them come in.  He says they shouldn't have gone to all that trouble, coming back early for the concert.  He saved them two tickets.  Jo is amused.

Like a horse and carriage:  The last scene is set at the British Legion.  A woman onstage bows and the onscreen audience claps.  The curtains shut.

Chrissy, Robin, Mildred, Jo, and Jo's date are in the front row.  The curtains open again.  George comes onstage in a straw hat and bow tie.  Mildred looks miserable, Robin as if he's having a great time.  There's a pianist to accompany the acts, and George launches into "Love and Marriage."  He's terrible of course.

Robin takes Chrissy's hand.  She tells him, "Get off!" and pulls away.  Mildred is humiliated and puts her white-gloved hand to her face.

Commentary:  As the episode begins, there's no indication that Robin is going to spend the weekend with Chrissy's family.  So the exchange about what she has of value just comes across initially as their usual banter.  And Chrissy's mother's visit just seems like a follow-up to the second episode, where Mrs. Plummer thought that people "were doing it all over."

We get a lot of insight into how Chrissy's family has shaped her personality.  Her sense of humour has her father's dryness-- she could say the "you're tactful" line-- but there's also the way she gently parodies her mother's dottiness, like with bringing her RSVP for the christening home with her and talking about Jo getting married.  Clearly, spending a couple decades with her mother has prepared her for Jo's Gracie-Allenness.  Also, if her mother is going to see the Common Market only in terms of hairy socks and early marriages, then it's no wonder that Chrissy doesn't want her to discuss politics, religion, or socks.   That pun and lines like the "triplets" one showcase Chrissy's wit as never before, and part of this episode's charm is that the writing has never been better, not just the wit but the character development of Chrissy and her family.

The type of feminist Chrissy is seems to have much to do with her mother nagging her about getting married.  Susan seems to have gotten married right out of school.  (She has to be at least a year younger than Chrissy and could be as young as 17, although she doesn't come across as that young.)  But Chrissy followed a different path, to London and independence.  Yes, she's "only a secretary," but she supports herself.  If her feminism sounds argumentative at times, it's no wonder.  She's got to contend with a mother who wants to treat her like prime breeding stock.

We don't get much of Chrissy's relationship with her sister, but it's interesting that she's the older one, because it confirms what we learn of her protectiveness towards some other women, like Angela in "Come Into My Parlour."  She and Susan seem to share a similar sense of humour, view of their parents, and practicality, as when Susan compares changing a baby to mucking out the cowshed.  Growing up on a farm has probably contributed to their realism.  It is ironic that Chrissy on "Two Foot Two" claimed she knew nothing about babies, but then she wasn't yet an aunt.

Chrissy's father comes across as more likable than her mother, more easy-going.  The scene with him and Robin drinking together doesn't have the sleazy undertone that the scene between Jerry and Larry did on "All in the Game," but then Dudley isn't an unscrupulous building contractor.  He's a protective father like Jerry, but seems less hypocritical about it.  He seems like he'd hit it off with Robin's father, although he's less blunt.

We don't see much of Ted but there's the impression that Susan is brighter and less innocent than he is, if not as sophisticated as Chrissy.

Robin's attitude towards the matchmaking is interesting.  On the one hand, he doesn't take it very seriously.  He thinks he's cleverer than Ted and so can't be trapped.  Therefore, he's mostly amused by it, even when it means he's going to be sized up as a potential stud.  Also, it provides an opportunity for him to tease Chrissy.  And yet, there is an undercurrent that he likes being matchmade with her, likes that her family would like to welcome him in.  (Well, maybe not Ted, but they presumably make up.)  The line about not being a bachelor all his life takes on resonance if you know what happens to his character down the road.  (At the risk of being over-spoilery, within three years Robin will be married to a woman he hasn't yet met.)  As for Robin loving babies, he did say back on "Two Foot Two" that he quite likes kids, so I don't think he's just playing along with Mrs. Plummer on that.

"I have to wash my hair," judging by TV sitcoms, seems to have died out as an excuse at some point in the late 1970s.  I had a theory that everyone with access to a bathroom washed their hair a few times a week, until the 1980s, when it became daily, but searching the Internet has not confirmed this.  If anything, it turns out that it depends on your culture and type of hair.  But from what I recall, white middle-class girls, at least on TV, had hair that took a long time to wash and brush, particularly in the days before blowdryers, especially if the hair was long.  The Brady girls for instance.  Even then, it was meant to be a lame but polite excuse to turn down an invitation.  It was a less common excuse for men, but not implausible for Robin, who's regarded as a long-hair.

If there's any doubt that Jo is a supporting character rather than a lead, simply compare her nephew's christening in "And Then There Were Two."  On that episode, we only got a glimpse of her family situation, and the plot mostly concentrated on the RCST.  Here, we spend time with Chrissy's family before and after the christening, and little Dudley gets some screen time.  Meanwhile, we don't even find out the name of Jo's date.

This episode's title may refer not only to Mrs. Plummer, who tenderly tries to trap young men into marrying her daughters, but also to Mr. Roper's more successful attempts to trap his wife and tenants into attending his concert.  Mrs. Roper's book choice this episode is probably not accidental.  She dares George to be more like Heathcliff, but she doesn't realise that he can manipulate her more by not ordering her to go.  Making everyone think he's pathetic turns out to be his most powerful weapon. And, yes, she threatens him with castration, when she already doesn't think he's manly.

His song choice of course is perfect for this episode, and while the subplot itself is nothing remarkable, it does give us a nice closing scene.

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